05
Feb 09Speaking of crazy racists…
Andy and I were talking about how much we dislike Sean Hannity today, so I decided to Wikipedia him. Buried near the bottom of the entry is this gem:
Hannity’s Internet dating service, “Hannidate”, matches conservative or Republican-leaning singles, straight and gay. Begun in 2005, it is described as a “place where people of like conservative minds can come together to meet.”
I never pass up a chance for accidental comedy of this caliber. And Hannidate does not disappoint:
- Gob bless America – “I’m pretty good with my music selection, surprisingly. I’m against rap music, though (I’ve got my reasons.)”
- I Just Need a Man to Tie Me to the Stove - “i’m just a regular christian girl, looking for someone to take charge in the relationship and be a man. hopefully someone who will let me cook for them and maybe someday do the hosuework for them if it gets to that point. [...] i’ve tried the liberal boyfriend thing and i will never try it again – i want a MAN, not a sissy.”
- Fair Enough! – “Because God created us as equals, if I tell you I will not be subservient to you beyond what you can justify, I mean it. Please take me seriously. I ended my last long-term relationship over this issue, and other than that, it was truly a match made in heaven.”
Update: By deleting or blocking cookies, you can get around Hannidate’s attempts to limit the number of profiles you view. I don’t think I can stress how much I love this site; it combines combines my love of ridiculous dating sites with my love of earnest True Believer conservatives.
- Patriotic, God-fearing, Fox-loving Lady – “It is our duty as Americans and God’s chosen to spread the word of the Lord throughout the world, whatever the cost. [...] My best feature is probably my long red hair, although all those years of wrestling with the hogs have given me strong thighs and a lean physique.”
- Kelly Beauchamp – “My best feature is my wit followed closely by my breasts.”
- Hi, I’m Bethany - “I love Disneyland (have an annual pass), country music, Christian music, church activities, Awana Cubbies, Internet, livejournal/myspace/facebook” [ed. note: this woman is 33]
- voted for mccain – “I only date white guys. I prefer taller than me blonde/red blue eyed guys. U don’t have to be ripped but I can’t do fat.”
- YOU BETCHA!!!!! – “Well. her we go — born brunette yes dye the hair blonde thin – Honestly my arms are tone I workout and have a small waist this sounds so conceited I hate descibing myself I have to stop here before I throw up [...] NRA members = bonus points”
- I am what I am & It is what it is – “I believe that it is our responsibility to uphold and re-establish the moral fiber of our country. I am very excited about Palin as VP of our country and will do whatever I can to persuade people to not destroy the foundation of our country by electing Obama.” [ed. note: whoops!]
- Oh, Here I am…I finally Made It! – “Nothing like some dead cow and sh!t smeared
across ur face!” - David Bowe’s aren’t real [ed. note: the rest of this ad wasn't interesting, but... what? What does that mean?]
Tagged: culture, humor, politics, pop